and this is the victory that has overcome the world, - out faith.

The only thing on earth that keeps me is God's love. I have days of storms, You know those days where by you are SOOOO clogged up by the futile of your own mind. Own selfish dreams, own selfish desires, own selfish wants. Many ways and route's to take are given to protect yourself, ensure your safety, your comfort. Getting rich schemes, manipulation, corruption. Its so easy to think what you have, what God has given to you each day is not enough. Its also easy to take things for granted. 

Yes there are times the devil try's to shake my faith, makes me wants to disbelieve, sometimes in storms, sometimes in a loveliest of places. Anywhere. But our faith is the one thing that can protect us from the world. Its knowing that, whatever we go thru, God's with us. Its nothing compared to what He has prepared for us.

But without faith it is impossible to please Him.

I want everyday to be a mission trip for Jesus. You know, i really hate how they have fro fro up church to be the 'worldly coolness' how they have made mission trips become holidays, risk free, see the 3rd world, spend time with the kids, and go back home to your old life. I want to be a changed person. But i know that i want it to happen genuinely, that only God can truly change me. 

and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.

I still do not know how people can put themselves up so high. Take so much leadership, well maybe im just not mean't for it thats why i don't understand. Well im mainly talking about really huge churches. With hundred dollar seats. If i was a pastor, i guess i'll just be a missionary, or i'll just live my life like how God wants me to. Not building an organization for him where christians can hide. But i thank God that i am able to know that, in all of that, God is mightly working :) He is with whoever who calls Him with a humble heart.

Wherever He place me. I know He'll give me joy :) I don't know why He has called me to Italy. I know it would be a blast! a new experience! i won't take it for granted and i'll travel as much as i can:) I know there is a purpose. And i won't forget what i have learned here in Malaysia. How much i am blessed by my experience here. The people, everything. Knowing that, knowing again and again, its not about having personal goals or personal dreams. Its not about making it Big for Jesus, being perfect, being famous, rich and all that. Its all about having faith and trusting God that HE knows whats best all the time, He is the main provider in my life. 

He'll never leave me nor forsake me :) Thank you God for everything!. Blessings come both big and small, they all have something you can take from. All because its bigger doesn't mean its better. All because its smaller doesn't mean its insignificant. All because I receive something 'world defining-ly awesome' doesn't mean its evil. YOU SEE, GOD IS THE GREAT PROVIDER, He doesn't show Favouritism!!!! :D He knows the beauty in everything and He shows them to you!!!. They are everywhere. I feel loved God i do!. Im flawed and imperfect. imma gonna lean on ya.